part-timer

Dang.  Finding a part-time job is HARD.  I hate applying for jobs and not hearing back.  I tried applying at lululemon and Whole Foods but no luck.  There's a secretary job I was looking at but I'd really rather not work full-time right now.  The kids have a lot going on, I like being around for them.  I just want a part-time job a few days a week but it's not looking promising.  I have no retail experience, do you really need experience to sell sweatpants?  I can't say that I've been wowed by a sales person recently, what on earth are they looking for?  Whatever.

Ralphie has a field trip today to a pumpkin patch that I wasn't invited to attend.  WTH?  I've signed every sheet I could find to express my interest in helping in the classroom.  Why bother taking my name if you're only going to contact your friends?  Annoying!  Ralphie really wanted me to go, he was upset that I wouldn't be there.

Today is day three of Weight Watchers.  Have I ever mentioned that I hate diets?  Of course I have.  I think I've already dropped two pounds, I think there are probably another eight to go.  Yago has been trying to do it for months but without my support it is almost impossible for him.  If I'm constantly baking and not paying attention to calories in the meals I make it makes it really difficult.  I bought an ice cream machine a couple of weeks ago too.  I am really terrible!!  The kids love it though!

heavy

Yago and I started working out together in the mornings twice a week.  The apartment complex has been kind enough to provide a personal trainer for group sessions a few times a week.  It has been fun working out together and starting our day with a good workout.  I think the trainer finds us mildly amusing at 0600 too, so that helps.

I've been doing cursory searches for work but haven't found much.  Mickity suggested a virtual assistant and it may be something I look in to eventually.  If I could just get the darned reserve slot here I'd be satisfied but it doesn't look promising.  No one is motivated to do the required paperwork.  In the meantime I'm kind of dog-sitting for another goldendoodle.  I declined an offer for pay and instead decided to take it out in trade.  They dog-sat Rana Saturday while we hiked a trail along the coast of Rhode Island.  That worked out really well for us.

Little Ralphie keeps getting bigger, it's starting to make me sad.  He's so adorable in the clothes we picked out while school shopping, he still wears whatever I grab for him.  Schmitty, not so much anymore.  My time is so limited, it's almost heartbreaking.  It makes me wonder if I'd entertain the thought of getting pregnant again if Yago hadn't had a vasectomy.  I don't think so but ...maybe? Certainly not when I'm screaming toward 40, right?  I love doting on them even though I know that doesn't make for very productive or independent adults.  It's just that I can still comb Ralphie's hair and do things like that for him without being pushed away.  I've got a couple more years, tops, then it's over.  Schmitty's sprouting hair and pimples like no one's business.  He does still let me kiss him good night though, for that I'm thankful.

loose ends

Lately I've been searching daily for jobs at usajobs.gov.  I'm not really sure exactly why but I can't help myself.  Ralphie will be starting Kindergarten and I feel like I need to do something, I want to do something.  The problem is I also want a very flexible schedule and freedom.  I want to be off when my kids are off.   I also don't want to miss any school functions for my little Kindergartener!  I tried applying as a preschool assistant that would enable me to do that but it's been close to a month and I haven't heard back...

I could, as Yago suggests, finish my degree.  However, the course schedule doesn't look too promising.  I've taken about all the online courses I can so I'll have to travel for my remaining four classes but they interfere with Yago's TDY schedule or with my kids' school vacations.  It's such a hassle!  I could also begin ACSC but I have VERY little motivation to do that.  I thought I'd have to be a major for three or four years before meeting a lt col board but it turns out that you have to have 7 years time in grade to be promoted to lt col.  No, thank you.  I'll put major on next year, wait seven years to be eligible for promotion, and then if I'm lucky enough to be picked up I have to complete three years in that rank to retire.  I don't have 11 more years of the Reserves in me.

Even if I did find a job, which is difficult given my level of experience, it would require a long commute.  Putting in a full day and then an additional hour on each end is not what I'm looking for.  I want a paycheck though.  I'd like to have some extra money to be frivolous on occasion.  I'd like nice clothes, bags, and to get my hair done without being concerned about what is being sacrificed.  It kind of stinks right now.  We're paying a fortune for an apartment and we don't have much wiggle room in our budget.  It's frustrating, especially if I dwell on what our finances would be if I'd remained active duty.  I'd be getting ready to retire.

But then I can't even think about how different things would be with Ralphie.  I'm glad I stayed home with him.  That's another thing.  Schmitty is vehemently opposed to me working.  Isn't that funny?  He likes that I'm home taking care of things.  That makes me feel appreciated.  Not that I'm unappreciated but his reaction reminds me that I do things that are important to him.  I know Yago prefers that I stay home too, it would be a huge inconvenience for him.  But millions of families make it work and seem happy, couldn't we do that too?  Perhaps it's just a case of the grass is always greener on the other side. I'm sure that after two weeks of getting up early, sharing the bathroom with Yago, coming home to make dinner, etc., I'd be ready to quit.  Right?  Sigh.  I don't know.

clubbing

We are moved in here in Massachusetts.  We looked at base housing but... I can't even describe it.  The homes were nice, I'm sure.  I mean they wouldn't let us inside the homes they were offering us because apparently maintenance doesn't ready a house until there's a signed contract for it.  The work order takes AT LEAST five days.  So even though they had empty homes they wouldn't let us in, we could drive by and look at floor plans.

Also, what seemed like a bonus was actually a con for me.  Hanscom hires contractors to mow the yards so you don't have to.  Now I remember living on base at Laughlin with a kid that was 18 months old and struggling to mow my lawn.  It was sometimes impossible to mow when I worked full time and was the single parent of a wee toddler.   Toddlers like to help and wander off, not good when you're trying to mow a big corner lot.  Anyway, I don't have that problem anymore but the base is full of weeds and just bad looking lawns.  Maybe I was spoiled in NE but I'm accustomed to people putting effort in to their yard.

One more thing, all the homes offered to us on base were duplexes.  Not what I was hoping for.  They had what looked to be beautiful single family FGO housing but none of those units were available.  Considering all that and the fact that the base has the crumbiest schools in the area, we declined.

Now we're in an apartment.  I found some lovely homes but they didn't accept pets, especially big dogs. We found a new apartment complex (I mean brand-spanking-new-some-units-are-still-under-construction) that took Rana.  The boys are happy because there's a pool and a clubhouse, the husband is happy because it's new and clean and I'm glad that the schools are good.

We've met some very interesting people so far.  The most notable is Doris Kearns-Goodwin's son Joe.  Yago was BBQing on the 4th and happened to meet  him.  He and his wife live in our building.  Joe said his mother frequents a place called Serafina's so Yago and I had drinks there Saturday night.  It's a great place.  We also met a guy at the pool yesterday who just moved in, he and his family lived in Manhattan for 10 years before moving here.  Manhattan, la-dee-da.  His wife does ratings for Moody's.

I'm hoping to start a book club here but I have to say, it's a little intimidating.  Doris' daughter-in-law, an investment rater at Moody's...  The pressure is on to choose an incredible book.  I'm considering Wild.  Any suggestions?

here goes

Today I sent my resume and whatnot off to Hanscom in hopes of getting a Reserve slot there.  Fingers crossed because there aren't too many (any) slots available right now.  Yago managed to get a lead on one that won't be published until early July so I'm passing my info on in hopes of getting hired before anyone knows about it.

Wednesday night Ralphie's school had an event that they were soliciting hard for cakes.  Sooo, of course I made a cake to take in to celebrate the founder's birthday.  Holy crap, so did just about every other mother plus someone bought a huge sheet cake.  I took our cake home and ate almost the whole gosh darned thing.  Bleh.  Normally I wouldn't care too much but I've been eating like a pig (see Seattle post) and not exercising much due to the rest period before our marathon.  That means I'm going to gain about 5 lbs right before the race.  Seriously, I'm not exaggerating.  Again, five lbs?  Not a huge deal.  Running 26.2 freakin' miles while carrying an EXTRA 5 pounds?  A huge deal.

I must apologize to a friend for an obnoxious political rant while in Seattle.  I can no longer speak of politics civilly, must learn to keep my opinions to myself.  Allow my opinions and thoughts to fester privately, in a healthy way.  =D

Seattle to Boston

Well, I went to Seattle with some friends.  Actually one friend and her friends but it turned out wonderfully.  We ate and drank so much that I thought I would burst open like an overfilled sausage casing.  Everything I ate was delicious.  By the way, you really can't swing a dead cat in that city without hitting a Starbucks.  We went to the very first store, it was pure chaos stuffed full of tourists.

Now I'm back home and the reality of moving is screaming up on me.  I'm stressing about schools and finding a place to live.  I want to live in a nice house that I don't feel embarrassed to entertain in while also living in the best public school district.  Is that too much to ask?  Apparently.  I'm a little miffed at our housing allowance because as near as I can tell it will get us a two bedroom townhouse.  It's ridiculous.  We're a family of four with an enormous dog, two bedrooms and one bathroom isn't going to cut it.  The base schools suck compared to the ones right off base so I'd really rather not live on base but we may not have many options.  Anyway, it's stressing me out.

Something else... I'm running that dag-gone marathon in a week and a half.  Ick.  I can't even bring myself to do the four mile run scheduled today.  I've just got to get out there and do it.  I skipped my 12 miler on Saturday while I was in Seattle so I really have to do something today.  I need inspiration.

doing it

I did the 18 mile run today.  In the cold rain.  It started raining around the second mile and kept up the rest of the dang run.  I was freezing when I got back to my billeting room.  I started the shower, peeled off my clothes, and discovered I'd put a couple holes through relatively new socks.  Last week I bled through one of my socks and this week I put my toes through both of them.  On the plus side, I only have one more training run that's longer than what I did today!

This is the last week of my TDY.  I can't wait to get home and see my boys.  Ralph's been having nightmares and Schmitty's been pretty grumpy whenever I talk to him.  I think I need to go home.  ;^)

grateful

I'm here in Dayton, OH, feeling so grateful this evening. I had a great run this afternoon of 12 miles. Our marathon is coming up in five weeks. Can you believe that? Five weeks! Lately, I've found myself in moments of deep satisfaction and gratefulness that my body has done everything I've asked it to. It's run up to 16 miles, birthed 2 healthy children, and survived BMT and OTS.

I have two more really big runs before the actual race. Eighteen miles next Saturday and two weeks later 20 miles. Only two more really long runs and I'll make it to the race. It got me to thinking today about how I tried this 10 years ago but had such a horrible long run at the 12 mile point in the program that I kind of gave up. The difference this time is Yago. I am so thankful for Yago. He has been so good to me, better than I ever could have hoped of a husband and partner. Even when I have bad runs and complain at every stop light, when we finish he gives me a, "Good job!" and a, "You did it!" When I'm disappointed that I was slow and know I held him back he is completely unbothered and reminds me to be satisfied that I finished.

I read a couple of articles on the internet this evening about marriage with comments consisting of, "It's hard work," and, "You have to work at marriage." Yago and I are coming up on our sixth anniversary and the thing is... I don't feel like it's hard work or sacrifice. He is a really great person that I really love hanging out with. I like hearing his opinions and thoughts on everything. I find him so interesting and funny. I am truly grateful for all I have tonight. (And I haven't even started with kids... those are two different and very fun boys! I dread and can't wait for them to become men.)

running out of patience

I'm at Wright-Patterson AFB in Ohio for three weeks. I spent this evening frustrated because I couldn't find/follow a running trail. You would think the base that hosts the AF marathon would have some marked trails... but no! I was supposed to do a 4-mile run but it was probably more like three because I got lost and eventually gave up. Plus, I thought they'd have some paved trails but it was all concrete which is murder on my knees. Tomorrow night I have an 8-mile run and I will have no patience for getting lost. Next weekend is 18 miles, I don't think I'll survive 18 miles on concrete.

good news

I've gotten lots of good news lately. This morning I found out I was picked up for MAJOR!!! Yea! I don't pin on until 28 Jun 2013 but at least I made it! I feel excited and relieved at the same time. No one likes the rejection of being passed over.

We'll be heading to Boston in a couple of months which is a dream for me. I've always wanted to live in New England. It's ridiculous how expensive housing is but I guess that's what the allowance is for, it's not really any money out of pocket. The drive out there will take us through my hometown. Yago and the kids have never been to my hometown. I know it's probably changed immensely in the last 20 years but I can't wait to see it again. We can go to my grandparents' graves and see relatives that I seriously haven't seen in 12-20 yrs. And there are the places I want to eat... like The Beef n' Barrel, Texas Hots, Allegany Sub Shop. Yummy!

I need to shower and meet a friend for coffee in a bit. It's been a good day!

how old am i?

I just found out that someone from high school passed away from a heart attack. He was a year ahead of me and in a couple of my classes. We didn't hang out, mostly because he was cool I didn't really hang out with too many (any) cool people in high school... but after graduation he got a job at Perkins and we waited tables together. He was really funny and did cool stuff like make milkshakes with coffee and Reese's peanut butter cups when the manager wasn't looking. They were soooo good and very ahead of their time. It was 1990, mind you.

Anyway, I can't believe all the people I know that have died. When I first graduated there was a rash of suicides including the class clown. Can you believe that? The guy had been cracking jokes and torturing teachers since fourth grade but then shot himself a couple years after graduation. Another guy was totally hot the object of a secret crush my junior year (and maybe senior year) but he committed suicide shortly after school too.

These days cancer seems to be claiming several of my friends. Now a heart attack. I thought this stuff happened when you hit retirement age. It's depressing to think of your own mortality, or worse, your family's.

fmail

My yahoo acct has been sucking up emails on me. I'll click on an email and it will momentarily pop up in the preview pane only to disappear before I can read it. When I check my trash or spam folders it's completely gone, as if it never was sent. I can't recover it.

For that reason, and all the spam I get, I tried to get a google mail account the other day. They don't have any combination of my first and last name available without a bunch of digits. I know the whole digit thing shouldn't be a big deal but my current email account is my first name dot last name. How easy is that? It's not embarrassing or hard to remember when I give it out. It's perfect. Not so with g mail. So I'm not as eager to switch anymore.

I picked up a TON of dog poo in the back yard. I know, not exactly riveting entries on the ol' blog but here's the conversation with Ralph:

Me: There's a ton of dog poop in the back yard but I don't feel like cleaning it up.

Ralphie: If I were Schmitty, I would help you...

Me: You don't have to be Schmitty to help. You can help me.

Ralphie: I don't want to do that! It will smell bad!

...Thanks.

Return...

So, I'm back finally! I've been so busy that I felt too guilty to update my blog. I was super far behind in my class and didn't want to post anything to my blog if I wasn't caught up in my class. Four more classes and comps. I can't wait for it to be done, I have no idea when that will be though.

Schmitty and Yago are at scouts and Ralphie's in bed. I'm catching up on tv but I should be reading. I joined (invited myself to) a new book club. They're reading A Catcher in the Rye. I just bought it today and the meeting is Sunday.

We had some people over the other night for the football game. We made margaritas with tequila, cointreau, and fresh squeezed lime. I had a couple but they were so strong they totally snuck up on me! I was sitting in the living room suddenly very aware of being completely drunk. Not a good feeling...

Oh, Yago and I are running. We're doing a Hal Higdon program. The 30-week super novice plan. We ran 5.5 miles last Saturday (in 23 degrees) and this week we're running three miles on T, W, Th, and Sat. I'm not sure my knees are going to hold up for another 20 weeks. We'll see. I think we're on week 11.